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WRITTEN BY Tom MacDonald
BEAT PRODUCED BY Tom MacDonald
SHOT and DIRECTED by Nova Rockafeller
http://www.instagram.com/NovaRockafeller
MIXED & MASTERED by Evan Morgan
http://www.evanmorganproductions.com
http://www.youtube.com/user/emorganproductions
http://www.instagram.com/EMorganProductions
Angelic
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
Fuck this had me wincing throughout the entire song.
Appreciate it bruv.
EpicrobotLeo Clapz
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
What a fuckin song
Blaze Myers
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
You should put the lyrics in the description for all of us to read along that'd be great man! me and my girl listen to every release!! And waiting for the newest release we follow on Facebook to so we know when you post a new video
greene show
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
This hits home man you the truth
The Practical Extremist
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
What a fuckin snowflake
Hermes Molina
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
Good morning, thank you sir. Palante
Angel Kist Bri
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
I’ve been clean and sober from opiates for 5 years after losing my husband to them, but man do I feel this song! 💜
Jakeyy T
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
This has quickly became my anthem
K. Holt
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
This hits the feels. Love you Tom' your music makes me want to try harder to be a better man.
Travis Minshull
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
Thanks Tom, straight up. I am going through a methadone maintenance withdrawal. I needed this. HOG 4 Life.
Steve Carney
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
The ‘anxiety’ track still hits hard af to me. Described my life without knowing me at all. Yet. Relate so much.
Morning Star
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
The doctor said to talk to him
If I wanted to get off my meds
But I never called his office in
Poured the bottle in the garbage can
I'm stuck in this apartment and
I'm anxious like the cops are here
I tried to call, like, all my friends
None of them are answering
Is this the moment where I can't control it?
Got no appetite, I guess the party's over
I can't sleep at night, and I keep rolling over
'Cause my skin is itchy and the paranoia
Got me worried, sick, and it is so annoying
I been throwing up, it looked like motor oil
But I chose to quit, and now I can't avoid it
The right things to do are the hardest choices
Is this the moment when I need a donor?
Liver failing from the liquor pouring
All the room is spinning, it ain't vodka soda
What is almost killing me is being sober
Talk about pitfalls
Surrounded by brick walls
This is what kids call
Withdrawals
Deleted every number from my phone, I'm staying home
Really wish that I was drunk with all my friends
I'm gonna beat it or I won't and overdose
Really wish that I was high with all my friends
I never cared for therapists
My arrogance embarrassing
It isn't fair to tear with this
Addiction place my parents in
I'm scared repair will never fix
The voluntary negligence
The wear and tear my errors did
They almost had to bury me
Is this the moment where I screw up and relapse?
Waste all my money on rehab
Can't take a pill from the doctor to relax
Lash out in anger whenever I react
Feel like a weak man, I don't wanna be that
Living every day to get a buzz on the weekend
I'm in the deep end, fighting with demons
Tryna stay clean, I just really need a reason
My bones are shaking and my hands and feet
I see my rib cage, but I can't eat
I still wake up panicking, so I can't sleep
I just sit in the bathtub and try to breathe
Talk about pitfalls
Surrounded by brick walls
This is what kids call
Withdrawals
Deleted every number from my phone, I'm staying home
Really wish that I was drunk with all my friends
I'm gonna beat it or I won't and overdose
Really wish that I was high with all my friends
I've never felt this bad before
I don't know if I'll make it
Don't have the strength to get off the floor right now
But I'm hoping and praying
My whole life I wanted more
This might be the end
But now I've had too much fun, it's over now
I loved what I hated
Deleted every number from my phone, I'm staying home
Really wish that I was drunk with all my friends
I'm gonna beat it or I won't and overdose
Really wish that I was high with all my friends
Deleted every number from my phone, I'm staying home
Really wish that I was drunk with all my friends
I'm gonna beat it or I won't and overdose
Really wish that I was high with all my friends
Ralph Teo
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
I notice you do sing alot about being surrounded by demons, try singing about angel's serrounding you. Demons will laugh now but will most certainly cry later hold on to hope never let go.
Ralph Teo
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
I miss my old times too some-times
,Tommis I know what you mean about battling the demons life throw's at you some say, That those situations are life obstacles in your way. Others say its a test. But when times come to fill in the ranks in the clouds Looking upside down from the clouds. When heaven cleans house and you gotta watch. Ignoring sympathy can be depressing.
samantha whitinger
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
A few years I wanted to OD because I felt I was SO far gone! I didn’t want to live to be 30, 30 came and went and I’m still here. I dont miss it, dont miss the game, the high, and 💯 dont miss WD. Music has saved my life more than once. Thank you for sharing your experience. I appreciate it immensely ❤️
tyler bailey
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
This song speaks the truth I'm 25 years old been in and out of rehab for the past 5 years I truly know what u feel the pain and addiction is so really alot of days I wanna relapse but I cant
Lanesa Nuñez
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
I have goosebumps! This is probably one of my favorite songs that Tom has put out.
James Wilson
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
I have two words for you my brother to save your life! ALKALINE DIET! No disease can survive in the body when your PH is alkaline! Do your research and you'll find out the truth!
beefbite
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
Rofl no new ones yet? Unlearn has been dropping bombs all day. Apathy. Kick ass man. Ancestors used alcohol. Dont have the strength to get off the floor? Snow patrol whining ./' if i just lay here ./'
Rob T
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
I'm stupid drunk right now gotta work tomorrow this song trys to help me but my habits are greater than being sober one day I will be I doubt it but until then I'm successful right now ive lost everything and got it back i continue everyday day life fuck covid
Cori Porter
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
Love..
Spicy Ike
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
Thank you Tom.
Jack G
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
Listening to this after getting home after another bender can’t remember last time I slept and my mental health is at its worse! I really do hope I can get past this chapter in my life and commit to sobriety🙏
Scott Branham
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
Tom low key just sold out all his friends out as drug addicts.
Dizzle D Productions
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
You almost brought a tear to my eyes with this one Tom. Reminds me of my 19 year old son Noah who can't get/stay sober. Love you brother. Keep it up!!
Audriana Guzman
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
I’m so sorry to you and everyone who’s going through dark times, Tom I just want you to know that you are VERY strong inside and out, you can fight this battle and you can win!! 🙌💪🏆I listen to this song when I’m going through things and it makes me feel better and stronger 👉https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=b8VoUYtx0kw
Worthless951
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
Get goosebumps every time I listen to this one and church…..cuz I know what it’s like with alcohol…..I’ve done way better but it is a vary hard addition to fight, love the music Tom thanks
Anthony Pino
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
You're doing important things for the world Tommy.
AL- GA
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
I can feel it bro 🥺 everything you said
bones sk8r
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
I honestly don't like this guy but I really like this song
Paws4lifeplayz
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
Dear Tom I hope you at reading this I am a bit can and I am also a kid. My dad and my mom think you are the Angel that god has went to earth because you can help everyone see what is happening. I wish to meet you one day. I love to sing and you inspired me to be like you. I hope I can become as good as you hope to meet you in the one day. You inspire me and I know if I work hard one day I can be like you.
Kalan You
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
Lowkey I hop tom and his are doin good
Kalan You
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
I think people are slowly realizing that tom played both sides and all his fans
Mrs. Skillz Nelson
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
Listening to this drinking..wishing I had friends😔
#ExcitedAboutEverything
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
Thank you Tom for expressing these major issues because many people (also me) are unable to articulate them.
Clexious S
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
im free from drugs but not from the lifestyle and in my transition into sober living this is where im at too, i didnt really destroy myself but my brother died. i dont do shit now i just sit at home because i dont want trouble or a relapse, i grew my hair like yours. Im trying to just be strong dude. Im autistic an Ex addict with PTSD and severe anxiety. but im still here making it work trying to find other ways to be myself.
V1Oneshot
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
I can relate to this because when I was 6-11 yrs old at the time my uncle had drinking and drug problems and he couldn't stop drinking and using drugs and one day he punched my aunt and she had a black eye and a lot has happened and they had to put their own children up for adoption and they were far distance from each other and my family moved because they thought it wasn't safe for me to be living in the same house as them and there was a bunch of fighting not only with them and I cried because we all didn't have the relationship we used to all have in a 2 story house with about 16 people in the house and we decided after we moved into a different house to move to Texas and after that we moved to Wisconsin which is where I am living right now and so far they've been doing great in rehab and aren't that bad with drinking anymore but I found out that my cousin isn't the way she used to be and she's transgender all because the one she's been getting taken care of has been manipulating her into thinking things and making her hate my uncle who has been treating her the right way and I will never remember the way she used to be and will never see it ever again and it hurts and plus I will never be able to see my pappy's dog again because he died last month and I won't ever be able to see my 3 cousin's again because they were put up for adoption and the one thing I cried inside about was the fact that my grandma lost her weight after years and I really wanna see my uncle after getting off alcohol and drugs and I really hated the way we always fought in the house we were all in and it hurts and it scared me and the cops came over because of that, remembering that and I stabbed myself more than 10 times with a piece of glass and some of the stabs hit my bone and I have scars on my hand and I was surprised I didn't hit an artery or a vein on my wrist because I have a scar on my wrist too from me stabbing my wrist and my mom knows about this which what happened in Alaska hit all of us hard from what happened from Alaska to all the way up when we moved to Wisconsin so that's my story of why I can relate to that
Dawna
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
Recovery is one of the most lonely feelings in the world. Millions of others out there know this struggle all too well but somehow when we're going through it, we still feel like the only one in the world. Everything you've ever self medicated for comes flooding back to you at light speed and hits like a fkn mack truck with severed break lines. You know that just one pill, a few shots or one fix can make it stop… you just want it to stop. You choose sobriety but in order to keep it, you have to avoid every friend you've got because misery loves company and they are all too happy to have you back on the merry go round. Please God, just make it stop!! 🙏
Mrs. Skillz Nelson
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
Scary it's so Relatable 😔💯❤
Matthew Haviland
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
You're not clean, if you're on drugs. And that includes "Pharmaceuticals."
Joseph Ayscue
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
The only one that you told the truth to, that tattoo with one word to remember his home.
Jakub škarvada
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
This good
angelofheaven112233
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
Tom, sell a piece of your music as an NFT I think this could be an awesome path for you, you have some awesome content and a unique artist ❤️
DEUS SALT
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
So can someone please tell me why cuss words are always censored in Tom's songs? Is that his choice to mute them or does he do it as a way around the YT algorithm? are the CD's also censored as well? I love his music but I'm not gonna pay money for a CD if it's got "***-kicker" in place of "ass-kicker" not being a hater at all. I'm just confused as to why someone who is so opposed to censorship and "woke" bullshit censored profanity in his own songs.
smile sad
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
999
Daryl Hakeem
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
Best part is. Drunk need confidence like im actually by myself. Tom your helpin folks..
617 Savage
August 8, 2021 at 5:23 am
Wow I really need this right now with my personal battle !!! Thank you